Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Word to the wise

Recently, my parents came for a surprise visit a few days ago. Which is awesome and I really loved seeing them. They're amazing people, married for over 37 years and I admire them greatly.

I just have a few wise suggestions if your parental units deciede to one day surprise you with their presence.

#1 When your parents come for a surprise visit, make sure all your "bad" movies are put away.

#2. When your mom asks to use your computer seriously make sure you get every single "item" that would offend her (everything) off and erase your search history and favorites. Really, it's for the best...

#3. Make sure your bedroom door is closed when your "pseudo" boyfriend gives you a late night call after every one has gone to sleep.

#4. If your mother is a Naturopathic Dr., don't plan on getting her out of the Health Food Superstore Haven anytime within the next 3 hours. Actually, you might as well leaver her there for the rest of the night.

#5 Have a bottle of Lysol ready in the bathroom after your dad uses it.

#6 Make sure the handcuffs you got for Christmas are also put away... as well as the glow in the dark... *cough* nevermind...

ANYWAY, If you follow these simple guidelines, you should have a very pleasant, enjoyable visit with your loving parents.


Blogger The [Cherry] Ride said...

That reminds me of a time in college when I slept over at my girlfriend's place and her parent's showed up the next morning - while I was still in her bed!

(And yes, RevRee, there was a time when I actually slept with women.)

Wed Apr 04, 01:57:00 PM  
Blogger tfg said...

Your parents sound a bit uptight. I usually make my mom polish the benwa ball collection when she comes by.

Wed Apr 04, 07:08:00 PM  
Blogger Mighty Dyckerson said...

Fuck that. Next time mommy and daddy come to town, give them the number to the nearest Motel Six.

Thu Apr 05, 05:14:00 PM  
Blogger NAME: Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Sweet sassy molassy! Those are guidelines to follow when you're parents visit and you're a supafreak. Keep doin' what you're doin'.

Fri Apr 06, 06:13:00 PM  
Blogger Malnurtured Snay said...

Sounds like tremendous fun - how much of a "surprise" visit was it?

Fri Apr 06, 08:55:00 PM  
Blogger Mr. Fabulous said...

Man, you are such a naughty girl. It sounds as if it would almost be easier to keep two apartments. A "good girl" one and a "bad girl" one...

Sat Apr 07, 09:30:00 AM  
Blogger TG said...

LOL! That's good advice!

Tue Apr 10, 09:20:00 AM  
Anonymous Tripe Face said...

You forgot to mention a few other tips:

Take the can of whipped cream off the night stand and put it back in the fridge... or just throw it out.

Put the lacy black undies (and the ones that read "smokin' hot") in the bottom of the last drawer in your dresser and put the white cotton undies back in the top drawer.

Unroll the $20 bills in your purse.

Finally, make sure you remove that picture of me from your computer desktop... especially the one body part that makes MD feel so inferior.

Luv ya Rev.


Fri Apr 13, 05:10:00 PM  

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