Thursday, November 24, 2005

Double Cheese Burger in Da Hood

Just the other evening, I went to grab a bite to eat with my friend...we'll call him "Sam" He just got a brand new car and wanted to show it off and take me for a quick ride. We're both poor so we decided to have a lovely dinner at McDonald's Yes I know, it's almost too much to bear! I have a total of $3 to spend, he had $5 worth of McDonald bucks! We're high rollers!

Anyway, we decide to take a longer driver and go to an out-of-the-way Micky D's in the ghetto. We get inside, and there's a very young mother there with her 5 children. I promise you, there were 5 babies all under the age of maybe 10! Running around the joint, screaming and demanding everything on the menu. The mother is being yanked in all directions from her children. She keeps changing her order and for some reason, they only have one person taking orders.

By this time, they're 6-7 people in line waiting for this mommy to finish. I see employees standing around looking at us all, not chipping in to help mind you, just staring. FINALLY a manager comes from out of the back, as he's zipping up his pants. Right behind him is this chick...she's making sure her hair's nice. The "Shift manager" steps up and asks me what I want. I make my order, as does "Sam".

As we're waiting for our order, the MOM finally makes her choices and is given the total. She throws her huge bag on the counter, bends over to reveal her thong, lifting up her pant leg and pulling out a wad of cash. A wad of $100 bills. She hands one to the teller, he looks at it and says they can't make change for a $100. She takes it back, files through her stash and finds a $20. I'm thinking to myself "Why the hell is she keeping all that cash in her sock??? Oh yeah, we're in the "hood"!

"Sam" and I get our orders and begin our journey to find a seat in this HELL HOLE. As we walk through the valley of the shadows of death, we pass by two teenage boys, sittin in the corner. They're not eating anything, they're just sittin there...I think they were cracked out? We pass by an older couple, frantically eating their happy meals and playing with their happy meal toy.

THEN the master piece...a very large man, sitting at a table in the corner. In front of him 6 rolls of quarters (I counted them before passing by) A key chain that was FULL of little charms, stuffed animals and anything else he could fit on it, but oddly no keys? He had a pile of burgers in front of him, along with a huge pile of frys! It was the most grotesques thing I'd ever seen. His face was messy and as I passed him, we made eye contact...his eyes were cold and hallow. I think he was dead...

"Sam" and I quickly ate our food and got out of there as fast as possible! Once we get out the door, I spot this...this THING parked right outside of the building. My jaw dropped, I wanted to scream in complete terror! But I froze, as two rent-a-cops pull up. They slowly walk inside as we hurry to our car. I tell "Sam" I want to get a picture of this THING He tells me to run back over and snap a shot, I tell him I'm too freaking scared to go back other there. He says "Ok, I'll drive by and you hang out the window and grab a quick shot" I agree to this idea. So "Sam" proceeds to drive slowly as I hang out the window and I get a quick snap shot! This is what came out of that picture...

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As you can see, I've marked just some of the areas that were very interesting...There was so much more a picture just could not capture. I might have to go back sometime and see if I can get another shot, but I'm kinda scared to ever return to hell!


Blogger Mighty Dyckerson said...

I think the picture needs a few more arrows...

Thu Nov 24, 07:38:00 PM  
Blogger Ryan said...

This is freaky. This is almost exactly how my Thanksgiving was.

Fri Nov 25, 05:09:00 AM  
Blogger Frank McBoob said...

Was the car that of the thong, 100-dollar-toting mom?

That would explain the abortion stickers.

Frank U. McBoob

Fri Nov 25, 01:30:00 PM  
Blogger RainStorm1212 said...

Sounds like you were in my district. Did the mangager have a Mickey D smile on his face as he was zipping up his pants?

Sat Nov 26, 08:44:00 AM  

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